So since some men like to mentally masturbate through their dating life, which ironically leads to more actual masturbation....here is a nice, technical flowchart to answer one of the most often asked questions.
Click on the chart below for a larger view:
This chart applies when you deal with young girls that like to play games EVEN if they are attracted to you?
ReplyDeleteWhat do you do when a young girl is playing games with you?
Yes it does. Because the only reason women (young or old) play games with you is because they sense you have very little to no options. You want the girl far more than she wants you, so she can mess around with you and you'll take it.
DeleteMen who have many options with women don't really deal with a lot testing and games. Women know they'll just be with someone else. This is why men who are good with women always have women who make it very easy to spend time with them.
Read my posts on Desperation and Fear. If you're experiencing a lot of game playing then you're desperate and fearful around women...even if you don't think you are.
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ReplyDeleteBut some women BELIEVE that playing hard to get is the way to get a guy, ESPECIALLY if they are young. I understand what you say but I think if I deal with young girls playing games is inevitable, they don't know better.
ReplyDeleteGuys say that a lot, "I understand what you're saying but..." You know what follows after that "but"? It's your own inability to change your mindset and behave differently. So yes...women of all ages will continue to play games with you because they can...because you fear...and because they know you'll take it.
DeleteThose same young (or older) women will turn around and play no games with a man who doesn't care about what women think about him and has other options in his life.
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ReplyDeleteBy other options you mean: other women?
ReplyDeleteYes.
DeleteQuestion: How WELL you need to know a girl to ask her out on a date?
ReplyDeleteFor a guy who doesn't fear women and have all these false beliefs in his head - about 20-30 minutes of interesting and fun conversation.
DeleteFor a guy who thinks you have to be "careful" or worried about being seen as a womanizer as a negative, then it doesn't matter how many years you know her. The more she knows you the less attracted she will be.
How do I create a fun and interesting conversation?
ReplyDeleteThe fact that you're asking this means you have tons of fears and myths about women. On the right side of my blog there is a section titled "Men's Edition"; read those articles and implement the suggestions and start taking some risks in your life. You've let fear rule most of your life and this is why you're in the place you're in.
DeleteBaller08, how many grls do you recommend to hit on to have a chance with the numbers game?
ReplyDeleteI don't want to put all my eggs in one basket anymore.
My advice would be to stop over analyzing and making excuses and actually go talk to women. You fear rejection and failure when in reality is you haven't tried much...hence why you're stuck on that one girl. You lack options because you've never took any risks.
DeleteThere is no such thing as "failing" so long as you learn from each interaction and get better. So stop trying to quantify silly things such as "how many girls do I hit on" and just start talking to any woman you see.
I think my question is legit because almost every time I ask for a girl's telephone number or I say to her I want to take her out she changes her attitude from being interested to being aloof, ignores me, don't answer some of my texts, etc. in other words: playing hard to get.
ReplyDeleteSometimes it is hard to recognize when it is a game or a real rejection. I have had FEW interactions with women when there's no resistance to get together, and here you are saying just to move on if a woman does anything of the chart above. Well, that kind of attitude happens often to me and I think the only way to avoid it would be to hit on several girls at the same time and see who's more responsive. Just a logical question in my opinion. To go out with a girl it is not a smooth sailing, there's some resistance to do so.
This past week and weekend how many women did you strike a conversation with?
Delete3
DeleteAnd what did you learn from it? What was your mindset talking to these women? How was their reaction to you? What does that say about what you need to improve on?
Delete1st. of all, I'm afraid of what people could say if I hit on young girls 15-20 years younger than me. 2nd of all I'm afraid of rejection and becaude of it I look hesitant to move the interaction further (ask for the telephone # or ask her out) and hesitation is not attractive at all.
ReplyDeleteAlso, SOME young girls are interested in older guys, some are not.
I did ask for the telephone of a young girls at work, I think she's 25 y-o, I am 42 y-o, we were flirting before and she seemed interested, when I asked her to have lunch at work on Saturday when few pepole are at the cafeteria, initially she gave me a certain time to get together, afterwards she said she couldn't do it because something at work came up, I said to her she told me she was available and now she said that, she apologized. I texted her few days later and she didn't answer me. I SUSPECTED she rejected me or was playing games, so I left it like that. If I accepted her cancellation of the lunch "date" without saying anything I think I'd look kind of weak and keep texting without an answer wouldn't look good either. I USED to play along if I suspected a girl was playing games and it used to work, but I don't want to do it anymore.
So there you go, stop asking irrelevant questions. You think wanting younger women is bad. You fear rejection. Those things are what makes you unattractive. Basically to compare apples to apples, those things make you as unattractive as a fat woman is to you.
ReplyDeleteGo read my articles on "Nice Guys" and "Myths"...so long as you have this mindset you'll always fail.
Maybe you are gonna scold me again, but what can I do to don't "fall in love" wirh a girl that I really like? Hitting on several girls at the same time?
DeleteI'm working on hitting on young girls, I introduced myself to a girl that I like a lot and she was very nice to me. I noticed that I was way too excited just because I met her. I KNOW I shouldn't feel like this but I do and I don't know HOW to help it. I'm not a challenge at all.
You care too much about what women think. Read the Myths post and all the links. But at the end of the day you have to be willing to do things differently and don't give a shit about what women think of you....till you're willing to do that, nothing will change.
DeleteYou're like every guy that struggles with women, you want easy answers, you just want to think endlessly but never take much action or risk "looking bad". Nothing anyone can help you with except you.
I've noticed that I don't do what I'm supposed to do because of all the emotional pain I feel every time I try to hit on a girl I like. It's like going through a concrete wall.
Delete^ So, based on what you say I should hit just on girls that I really like, no more low hanging fruit, I have to do it EVEN THOUGH I'm nervous and my stomach is tense. I think that's the only way I'm gonna get rid of all the nervousness around girls that I like. I'm stuck right now, I'm not dating at all 'cause I don't want to fool myself with girls I don't like and I'm still not able to date those girls that I like. It sucks to be in this situation.
ReplyDeleteBased on what I've said, you should stop wasting time thinking of bullshit and take action, risks, learn and repeat.
DeleteAnd no, you date whoever, because you haven't earned your standards. You haven't earned the right to be choosy because you haven't done the necessary work to be an attractive man. You haven't earned your standards yet.
You're not "stuck"...you're just afraid. You put yourself in this situation, no one else. All you.
Less talk. Less thinking. More action.
Hi! I've been leaving my comfort zone lately and I noticed a lot of BS in my mind. I am afraid of what people could say if I date girls younger than me (an age gap of 15-18 years), as a matter of fact I've been criticized already for wanting to date girls younger than me, for females and males. Some of them have called me PERVERT! Because of this situation I've decided to don't talk about it with almos nobody, bur guys that date young girls, I've learned a couple of things talking to them.
DeleteBecause I'm afraid of what people could say if I date youn girls I have a lot of anxiety if I actually do it.
I've noticed too that I am very succesful with girls around my age because: I don't care AT ALL if it works or not, after all I don't like them that much. It is the opossite when I deal with young girls I like them too much and I care too much about the outcome which make me behave like a guy that is afraod around young girls (unattractive).
Also, I've seen how older women criticize my desire to date younger girls, I don't say anything to them anymore.
I've seen that some young girls are actually interested in daye older guys, others are not interested at all.
So, how can I solve this situation? I think I can solve it if I REALLY date young girls and not only think about it, I have to face my fears: How people close to me are gonna react, what people in general are gonna say, is a relationship with a younger girl gonna work or not?, etc. I'm paralyzed afraid of what COULD happen and it has not happened yet. I know, it is ridiculous but I'm really nervous about it.
Just action can change how I see the posibility of dating younger girls. Maybe all my fears won't happen at all!
You're thinking better now. Go with your last sentence except take out the word "Maybe".
DeleteOnly fat, ugly, older women and pansy, pathetic "men" who never get women and are basically walking vaginas will criticize you. Hot women love older men and attractive men will be completely supportive because its 100% natural for men to want to date thin, beautiful younger women.
This it might sound funny, but it isn't. When I interact with girls that I am attracted to I behave in such a careful way to don't "ruin" anything (even though nothing has happened) that I actually do nothing! I don't even ask for the telephone number. Maybe that's why I date girls that I am not attracted to and I am frustrated, because I don't care at all aboiut the outcome I behave a lot more freely, after all; what do I have to "lose"? Nothing.
DeleteIt's this sensation of "losing" the girl that paralyzes me.It is ridiculous, but it happens, even though I like a lot of girls out there. It doesn't make sense at all. Actually there's nothing to "lose" and a lot to gain.
^ It seems to be plain and simple fear of rejection. That's all. IDK why rejection has such a meaning with girls that I like, the opposite with girls that I don't like: my life is not affected at all, there's no meaning; next!
DeleteI have to have the SAME attiude I have with the girls I don't like with the girls I like. I don't care if it works out or not, I don't care if she says yes or no but with girls I like I care way too much and that's why I fail. Also, I have to hit on more girls that I like, otherwise the scarcity mentality shows up.
ReplyDelete